Thursday, March 19, 2015
Just a few sleepless nights
What is the point of all of this? Am I living my life fully? Am I doing what I am meant to do? What does all of "this" mean??
This is what keeps me up late into the night, pushing to early morning. It is a seasonal thing, as the world around me starts to change I begin to wonder... what is my purpose? Am I living, really truly living? How much time do I have left, should I be wasting it doing A, B, or C?
On a blog the other day, the author mentions this in her weekend post. It seemed pretty amazing to me that someone else is pondering it all too.
I never know what to do with these thoughts except ride the wave and let the feelings, the emotions, the fear and doubt wash over me and clean me off as I come through the other side. All of this usually entails me power cleaning the house, eating crappy, not sleeping well at all, being cranky and distant as I refind my happy spot. Maybe one day, I will find my answer and I can then follow that light out of the weirdness and not have to actually do it again.